Are You Just Following a Teacher or Investigating Your Own Experience?

What a good teacher or facilitator does is show people how to look at experience differently. 

There is nothing that will happen in a session with a teacher or at a satsang that will insure against the later arising of a story or trigger or urge to use.  Teachers don’t have the capacity to doll out insurance.  There is no magic bullet.  Leaving your awakening solely in the hands of a teacher is not a good idea.  They can help you know how to look.  But they can’t fix you.  A good teacher or facilitator doesn’t even see you as broken.

This work is a game of being conscious.  And being conscious is not something that happens just in sessions or satsangs or while reading a book or meditating.  Its not about the next method, even though methods can help.  But good methods just provide a way to be conscious presently.  That’s all.  Being conscious happens while you are shopping, sitting in front of your computer, spending time with family, driving your car and falling asleep at night.  It’s moment by moment resting, looking and sometimes inquiring.  A great majority of the deep work happens through being with emotions or sensations just as they are.

I’m so glad that there are a lot of good teachings and methods out there.  But in 2015, I want to continue posting and sharing about how being conscious is up to you.  Remember the phrase, “Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans?”  With this subject, consciousness is what happens when you are planning that next satsang.

Even if one teaching or method doesn’t resonate and you move to a different approach, it’s still going to be about being conscious, just with another tool, teaching or method.  In this game of awakening, nothing relieves us of the responsibility to be conscious in our own lives.  Examine your desire to fix yourself more than anything.  I’ve seen people get really frustrated because they thought that the Inquiries would give them a long term fix.  There are no long term fixes in presence.  Presence is simply being with what is arising now.  “Long term” and “short term” “fixes” for a “self” can all be examined as arisings now.

Even if you have had a recognition of awareness as being like the space in which everything is happening, life still includes the arisings because they are inseparable from awareness.  A recognition of awareness doesn’t fix people or insure against painful arisings happening later.  It merely shows up as a stable space from which to explore the stuff that is still being believed, the addictions that are still running the show, the anxieties that still bring about the fight, flight, freeze response.  Recognize that stable space but then don’t absolutize it.  How do we absolutize something that isn’t separate from anything else?  Move beyond holding onto some safe space.  Dive into and explore the danger of the arisings as they arise.  We are not here on this earth to pontificate about awareness only as some unchanging space.   Life contains all the vibrancy, movement and change of phenomena.  We don’t have to settle for any lines of division, no matter how profound they seem. 

Try to find awareness.  How is awareness divided off from the present color you see or the present thought?  Where is the dividing line?  Once you see you can’t find the dividing line, it becomes impossible to say that awareness is all there is, unless you include it all – the thoughts, emotions, sensations, situations, experiences.  And it is in those thoughts, emotions, and sensations that you will find the unexamined stuff that continues to cause suffering.  Hoping to turn away from the stuff that is arising is turning away from life itself. 

How do we do that when life is constantly happening?  Would we even want to do that if we discovered a way to be with everything?  And isn’t being with everything as it arises what awakening is really about?  We are still human, through and through, no matter how what experiences we have had, no matter what profound realizations have come.

Every moment is the opportunity to be with life.  There is no other opportunity.  This is why this work is really not about the latest teacher, teaching or method ultimately.   It’s about stopping now to look, again and again.  Once you begin doing this it becomes automatic. It is no longer work.  It is simply the way you experience life.

Being conscious is what happens while you are planning to be conscious in the New Year, while you are planning your agreement or disagreement with this post, while you are searching youtube for the next great video from that new teacher.  Why not start now. Look at that thought that wants to agree or disagree, that wants this to be more than about being aware now, that believes that there must be something more than what Scott is saying. 

"Working with Dan has been nothing short of transformational. His open heart, honesty about his personal experience and permission to be real and not hide have helped me unlock those qualities in myself. And that has been a total game changer. I've been truly blessed, not only to have him as my KI Facilitator, but also as my mentor. Without a doubt, working with him has helped me to show up authentically, helped sharpen my tools and made me a better facilitator than I would've been on my own. I can't recommend him enough."
Darby Totten
Certified KI Facilitator

Dan McLintock is a Certified Facilitator, Trainer and the Co-Developer of the Kiloby Inquiries method/approach the New Model of Recovery along w Scott Kiloby. 

A Jacksonville, Florida native, Dan graduated Flagler College in 2004 with B.A. in Theatre Arts and English Literature and has played music professionally in bands for over 20 years. But his true passion lies in sharing the context, possibility and practicality of healing, awakening and release. 

Dan has worked one-on-one with clients in and out of the Kiloby Center since 2017 and has an unconditionally loving and earnest approach to healing trauma, dissolving the drivers of addiction/suffering and unhooking long-held toxic beliefs about ourselves, others and the world at large. 

He’s also worked intensively, side-by-side with Scott Kiloby for the past three years to develop the transformative tools of the Kiloby Inquiries as well as the principles and approach of the “New Model of Recovery” rooted in unconditional love and non-judgment. Much of this approach was borne out of Scott and Dan’s work with each other on their own personal traumas as well as their work with clients at the Kiloby Center. 

Scott and Dan have simplified, demystified and condensed some of the principles and practices of eastern/non-dual spirituality into an easily accessible set of tools most anyone can understand, learn and utilize to free themselves from their own suffering. 

What is a Clarity Call?

What is a Clarity Call?

A clarity call is a free 30-minute introductory call with a Certified KI Facilitator. During a clarity call, you can ask any questions you have about KI and see whether a particular facilitator is a good fit for you.

To book a clarity call, select your preferred facilitator (hover over their picture and click the “Meet” button). Then, enter your email and click “Book Your Call.” From there, you’ll be able to select your preferred date and time and schedule your clarity call (please double-check your time zone before booking).

Valerie Vinger is a thriving survivor of life’s painful challenges and growth opportunities. She has worked with 12-step programs and is currently a 13-year stage-III cancer survivor. Her cancer recovery journey started with the traditional “cut, poison, burn” approach but eventually led her down a natural path to healing her body, her pain and suffering, and her buried emotions.

Valerie first stumbled upon Scott Kiloby at a workshop of his in Boulder, Colorado in 2012, which she says is one of the most transformative experiences she’s ever had. She is filled with gratitude for the person she has become through her journey with cancer recovery and with the Inquiries, which she describes as “coming home to myself.” She loves working with people who are ready for relief from their pain and suffering.

Julianne Eanniello is a Certified Trainer and Facilitator of both the Kiloby Inquiries and the Unfindability Inquiries (formerly called the Living Inquiries). She is also a Certified TRE Practitioner, and the developer of the somatic movement process called Natural Flow Movement. She works with clients all over the world on virtually any topic, including spiritual seeking, stress, anxiety, depression, pain and health related issues, traumatic experiences, repression, relationship issues, and general unhappiness with ourselves and our lives. She does this through online sessions, deepening courses, workshops and facilitator certification training.

About Julianne:

For most of my life I’ve wondered who I am and why I am here. As I was growing up, no one else seemed to be talking about these things, or even thinking about them, so I buried it deep inside and tried my best to fit in the way I was “supposed” to, all the while feeling like there was something desperately wrong with me and that I needed to fix it.

In my early thirties, the death of a young relative left me feeling hopeless and helpless, wondering what is the point of life if we’re all just going to die anyway? This launched me on a search. I didn’t even know what I was looking for, I just knew that there was a longing – a desperate longing for something that actually made sense about life. I learned several alternative spiritual and healing techniques. I meditated. I read books and watched videos. I eventually learned of non-duality teachings, and I read more books, watched more videos, and even sat with several ‘awakened’ teachers. Yet I was still searching, something still felt missing. I was looking for the key that would unlock the mystery of me and of life.

In my early forties, I developed a chronic health condition that left me unable to work for several years, and most days barely able to get out of bed due to extreme fatigue, brain fog and pain. I lost my banking job, and eventually lost my home. I saw a multitude of doctors to try to find out what was wrong with me, and used every tool in my metaphysical and alternative medicine toolkit to try to heal myself. My seeking became even more intense, and I was looking for a way to escape my pain.

In 2009, I met Scott Kiloby. Since I started working with him and doing the Living Inquiries, the seeking for enlightenment has stopped, and the question of ‘who am I’ is no longer relevant. My victim stories around my health started falling away. Once I started looking at my experience through inquiry, everything changed. I stopped chasing something ‘out there.’ I no longer seek some future state of happiness or peace. This is not to say that I don’t have problems, or ever experience pain. Quite the contrary. I still use the inquiries regularly, and now there is much less avoidance or resistance to what I’m experiencing. I experience more and more freedom in the present moment, exactly as it appears.

Having trained with Scott, I was one of the first to be certified as a Senior Living Inquiries Facilitator and Trainer in early 2012. In 2014, I moved to CA and became a business partner with Scott at The Kiloby Center for Recovery, where we worked with people suffering from addiction, anxiety, depression and more for the next 8 years.

I can’t imagine my life without these inquiries. They saved me from myself. If you are still suffering, searching, longing… I encourage you to give this a try.

As a young child I saw a picture of Jesus gazing lovingly at some children around his feet. I immediately longed for the unconditional love I saw in his gaze. At the same time, I was being read fairy tales, like Cinderella, and came to believe that romantic love would satisfy that longing for love.

So, I married my handsome prince at age 19. But then, by age 29, I found myself alone, as a single mother, with four young children. I was devastated and convinced that something was terribly wrong with me, to have ended up in such a predicament. 

I had learned to love and please others, but not how to love and respect myself. I was a “good girl,” and repressed my urges to have my own needs acknowledged and met. A wise teacher later told me, “We need to love everyone, including ourselves.” This was an amazing revelation for me!

Learning to meditate helped immensely to bring moments of peace, while I was sitting still, though I was still being triggered regularly in my relationships. Finally, the Kiloby Inquiries taught me how to turn my attention inside in daily life – towards the trapped thoughts and emotions I’d been running from – so that I could face and release them. It was like some tender, lost children began coming home, to take their rightful place in my inner world. 

I am honored and excited to be able to facilitate these wonderful inquiries for others.

Sumitra lives on the Hawaiian island of Kauai with some of her family. She has four grown children and six grandchildren. For many years she lived and worked in a yoga retreat community in California, and has taught yoga, meditation and Compassionate Communication in addition to facilitating the tools of the Kiloby Inquiries (since 2013).

Sumitra also loves working with couples and others with relationship challenges in a simple (though not always easy) deep listening practice that allows each person to be truly heard and acknowledged.

Alina is a certified KI facilitator & a founder of Presence Alchemy – An advance mindfulness platform dedicated to liberating suffering & limiting core beliefs through Kiloby Inquiries & non-dual awareness. Presence Alchemy was born eight years into Alina’s embodiment journey of an inner shift from ego to wakefulness. Alina works one-on-one with clients, hosts online intensives and training, and organizes local retreats & workshops.
Alec Rodrigues has been certified to facilitate inquiry since 2015 and brings a keen sense of intuition to his work. He believes that in connection, the deepest healing takes place, that the mirror of relationship is the best crucible for transformation. Through rest and inquiry, Alec has found the empowerment to meet others authentically and stop running so damn fast from the seeming “ordinariness” of life.

He currently lives in Washington state with his girlfriend and works as a training assistant for the KI Personal Mentorship Program, where he empowers enrollees by teaching them the KI tools.