The Story of Postponement
We are waiting.
Always waiting . . .
For the next job
The next partner
The end of the day of work
Our family members to change
The vacation to come
The promotion at work
For more money
Our default state is waiting because we process ourselves as stories living in time.
We are stories of postponement, always looking for some future state, experience, or thing. This takes a tremendous amount of mental and emotional energy. And we can take this waiting to our deathbeds.
Stop and ask yourself what you are waiting for. Aren’t you waiting for the end of waiting? Aren’t you waiting for completeness? If you found completeness, you would never follow the story of waiting again.
Take one moment and be here without that story.
Notice that, right here, right now, when you aren’t conceptualizing your life, there is no waiting. There is nothing to wait for because you are already complete as presence itself.
Once time (which means thought) enters the picture, you are waiting again.
If you read anything on this site, and then ‘wait’ for some spiritual experience to happen, you have missed the point of what I’m saying.
Stand as what you are right now. Notice that every time you believe you must wait for something to happen in order to be ok, to be free, to be happy, to be enlightened . . . you are conceptualizing again. You are telling the story of postponement.
Where is this person in your story? Is it here now? It may look like it but try to find that person without referencing a concept. If you cannot find the person except through a concept, how real is the person who is waiting?
Stop now. Look now right into your present experience. Before you think about yourself, notice that you are already here. Is what is already here waiting for anything?
Notice that when you say “yes,” you are back into the conceptual story. Notice that story and stop again. Relax. Observe your present surroundings. Is the tree in front of you waiting? How about the car? The house? The road?
Are any of these things waiting?
No, only the story of a person waits.
The tendency to process yourself as a story in time is the tendency to reduce yourself to a concept. And, although there is nothing wrong with concepts really, they aren’t real things. They are abstract stories, imaginary tales of people who are incomplete and inadequate in some way . . . stories that believe that the future holds the key to completeness.
But does the future hold the key to completeness? Isn’t the story of needing future a constant waiting game?
Stop living in the abstract. Notice that every time you observe your story while it’s happening and let it come to rest, the awareness that is present is not waiting for anything.
It is already complete, as it is.
Completeness doesn’t wait. It doesn’t need to. It is already complete. Every moment of everyday you have a choice to rest in the completeness of being, or conceptualize yourself back into a story of waiting.
If you still believe there is something to wait for, return to the top of this writing.